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Talk:KThxBye/@comment-3575890-20180909201717
Ari’s grief has hit close to home for me in many ways, and I am so disgusted that people are trying to make her feel worse than she already does. First of all, nobody knows the crippling pain of feeling responsible for someone’s death. You can’t know until you’ve suffered that survivor’s guilt. It is enough to drive anyone to the point of no return. Twice now Ari has experienced a situation wherein she has been blamed for a tragedy that was entirely out of her hands BOTH TIMES. It disgusts me that people are actively trying to add fuel to the guilt Ari probably already feels regarding Mac, but even if she fully acknowledges that she was not to blame in any way, and for her sake, I truly hope she has come to that revelation, there is no need for her to feel that complicated pain on top of the grief she’s already experiencing. Judgemental people who likely have never been touched by real substantial trauma in their lives, otherwise they would know to have some damn compassion for Ari in this situation, were so quick to assume Ari was cheating with Pete all along. I call bullshit. I’ll tell you right now what I think happened between Ari and Pete. Ariana was going through a most difficult time in her life. On top of the traumatic ordeal that she was coping with, she was watching someone she loved destroy himself. It was too much for her to take. Mac couldn’t be what she needed because he couldn’t even take care of himself and his self destructive behaviour was only contributing to her mental decline. It was an eye opening experience that gave her the strength to walk away. She had to leave that toxic situation. She had attested to this multiple times - how scared she was for Mac, how hard it was to be with him, an addict, while in such a fragile state of mind herself, how she realized the importance of having to to take care of herself. She found solace in a familiar face and fell hard. Take it from someone who KNOWS - when someone who can bring you the exact type of comfort you need and pull you off the edge of no return comes into your life, there is NO SUCH THING as too soon. As Ari very eloquently laments in Get Well Soon, you’ve got to do whatever it is you need to take care of yourself. If it wasn’t for my boyfriend right now, I promise you I would not have survived the ordeal I went through last year and am still going through. I am still here because I had him to protect and guide me through this. He has been my guardian angel and I cannot believe how blessed I was to have this amazing man come into my life when I needed someone like him most. Consider that Pete might have been that for Ari. When times are tough and it feels like your world is crumbling, all emotions are heightened. Conventional time tables are OFF THE TABLE. As nightmarish as trauma and PTSD is, it also is a powerful driving force that can bring people together. This is what I strongly believe happened between Ari and Pete. She had to leave Mac for the sake of her own mental health, and Pete was right there with open arms to pick up the pieces. Who is anyone to judge Ari for latching onto the solace she desperately needed once she was able to find it? I did the very same thing and it saved me from making a horrible life-altering decision of my own. Everyone tries to help in their own way, but very few know how to actually help specific to the situation is. Pete has trauma of his own. It’s not hard to speculate how they probably bonded. When you have someone constantly in your corner whose presence brings you peace and serenity, who can talk you down from making brash decisions, who genuinely understands you, who knows when you want to be held and when you need to be left alone, who tells you everyday how valuable you are, how loved, how missed you would be, it truly inspires strength in spades. I don’t know how Pete was able to help Ari, but prior to Mac’s death, she was the happiest she’d ever been and she did not shy away from sharing how she attributed a lot of that to Pete. When your heart is shattered and your world is falling apart at the seams, that is EVERYTHING. I know how my boyfriend was able to help me, and I have no doubt Pete was the same source of support for Ari. Nobody has any right to judge her for making decisions in her best interest thereafter. She removed herself from someone who made her miserable and started anew with someone who could make her happy. Who is anyone to begrudge her for that? Babe, you got to take care of your body.